the scary m’s

Remember in January when I wrote about signing up for a half marathon? Yeah.  That was a nice post.  I felt so inspired while writing it.

Now I actually have to run it.  I actually have to line up with thousands of other women, pretend I’m not terrified of passing out at mile 3 or having Granny pass me by and laugh in my face.  I have to run thirteen miles fast enough to finish by the end of a day!  I signed up for this thing, and in exactly four weeks I really have to lace up my running shoes and put my body through what will probably be the most self-inflicted pain it will ever go through.  

I can hear you mothers saying “What about childbirth?  There’s nothing more painful than that!”   Yeah, you’re right!  But I had an epidural with both my kids!  They don’t give epidurals for running marathons!

Yes, I know.  I’m being dramatic. But there’s a point to all of my moaning and groaning.  I want you to see how scared I am of running a half marathon.  How terrified I am of putting my body and my mind through it.  Because do you know what is even more scary to me than running this half marathon? 

Letting someone read my manuscript.

I am in the final editing stages of my first book.   This is the book I plan to enter into a writing competition in November and it’s time for me to let someone else read and critique it.  Let’s just say that I am ten times fifty times more scared of letting someone read my very first book than I am of running the half marathon.  Limping for thirteen miles – no big deal!  Handing over 80,000 of my most precious words to someone who might not like it?  Terrifying!

I could use a pep talk.  For the marathon or the manuscript, it doesn’t matter.  Just tell me it won’t hurt too much, ok?

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4 thoughts on “the scary m’s

  1. Dawn says:

    You can do it! You know I can totally identify with diving into a physical endeavor over working the writing.

    Force yourself to send out the manuscript, because you will, because you must… Be patient and kind to yourself when you get responses.

    You’ll find the right publisher or contest.

    Go go go!!! You can do it!

  2. Laurie says:

    Oh, that’s thrilling! I think I can somewhat empathize on fearing the writing comments more than the marathon, but I already know I couldn’t do the run. Be kind to yourself, though. Writing – the fact that you finished something, which I’ve yet to do – is in itself incredible. Finishing that book I expect took dedication.
    You practice in terms fo running, right? I hope? Anyway, good luck – with both.

    • Bonnie says:

      Thanks Laurie! Now that I’ve actually completed a manuscript I look back and wonder how I did it? Will I be able to do it again? 🙂 Always a worry. I am proud of this one though.
      And I am training for the marathon, and keep telling myself that if I can make it through the highs and lows of writing my first novel, I can make it through 13 miles of running too. 🙂
      Thanks for visiting! I’m looking forward to peeking at your blog, I love to read poetry!

  3. Laurie says:

    Look forward to hearing from you 🙂 Honestly getting comments is probably the highest point of my life, in terms of the website. It’s something I treasure. Anyway – it sounds like you’re approaching it from a reasonable point of view, which I expect helps. personally, the idea of running a marathon scares the heck out of me, but that’s ok. I’ll do a reading-marathon instead in thoughts of you 🙂 Lol. I really hope it goes well, though. This kind of thing is pretty amazing, in my opinion. Good luck!

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